


You Don't Get Anything Clean Without Getting Something Dirty

by LithiumLullaby



Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Anal Sex, Bottom Aziraphale (Good Omens), Car Sex, Established Relationship, Ineffable Husbands (Good Omens), M/M, Rimming, The Bentley Ships It (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-07
Updated: 2019-10-07
Packaged: 2020-11-27 05:24:49
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20942981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LithiumLullaby/pseuds/LithiumLullaby
Summary: “Come now Aziraphale, the car won't clean itself. I’ve kept it in pristine condition since the day I acquired it.” Crowley purred, his eyes roaming across Aziraphale’s body as he returned to his work of cleaning the backseats.The Sequel to No Harm Ever Came From Reading A Book. Crowley makes Aziraphale clean the Bentley after the witches spell incident and things get a little steamy.





	You Don't Get Anything Clean Without Getting Something Dirty

**Author's Note:**

> This is a sequel to this fic I wrote earlier this year. [ **No Harm Ever Came From Reading A Book** ](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19347976)
> 
> You don't have to read it in order to understand this story but it would explain a few things.

Crowley settled himself further into the striped deck chair he was lounging in. The sun was beating down, illuminating his pale skin. It was another glorious summer afternoon. The usually jolly Aziraphale on the other hand was not enjoying himself. He was currently sweating profusely despite having shed his many layers and rolled up the sleeves of his starched shirt.

“Crowley, my dear, surely it would be easier if I just used a small miracle?” Aziraphale paused to address the sprawling Demon.

“Don’t you dare, Angel. You promised remember? You would have my car squeaky clean after the mess you made in it” Crowley gave a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows.

“Yes, true but I didn’t think I’d have to do it the manual way” Aziraphale blushed furiously, they really had made quite a frightful mess of the old car.

After having rescued Aziraphale from an ill-humoured aphrodisiac curse hidden in a witches spell book, Crowley had decided that instead of returning to London they should rent a cottage in the countryside. The hour was late and it was already getting dark. The Demon helped the exhausted but satiated Angel redress himself and with the help of a miracle or two they managed to find a pretty little cottage in Ardeley. It just happened to become available at the late hour.

Crowley took pity on the bashful Angel by ushering him into the king size, plush bed to rest. Aziraphale was still flustered and morbidly embarrassed he’d coerced Crowley into having sex in the back of the Bentley, even more horrified at the mess of bodily fluids he’d left on the upholstery. Crowley lost count of the times Aziraphale apologised and promised to clean the Bentley, eyes pleading for forgiveness from under the sheets. The Demon smirked while placing gentle kisses on Aziraphale’s forehead, lulling him to sleep while they cuddled. He whispered praises, compliments, and a declaration of holding the Angel accountable in the morning as they drifted off.

This was how Aziraphale came to be in his current predicament. His Demonic lover fiendishly demanded that he clean his car, manually, without miracles to the Angel’s horror. The only divine intervention the wicked snake offered was the cleaning products and sponges.

“Come now Aziraphale, the car won't clean itself. I’ve kept it in pristine condition since the day I acquired it.” Crowley purred, his eyes roaming across Aziraphale’s body as he returned to his work of cleaning the backseats.

Aziraphale couldn’t think of a worse punishment for something that really wasn’t his fault when you think about it. He grumbled to himself, assuming the lazy Demon was just going to sleep in the sun while he worked. Irritated, Aziraphale lost himself to the task at hand.

The seats were clean so he moved onto the windows. It took time to remove his own hand print from the glass and eventually the inside of the car was clean. Flushing vividly, the sight of the silhouette on glass brought back the heated memory of ecstasy. He recalled the pleasure the Demon gave him in the throes of passion. Shaking his head to clear his mind, Aziraphale knew the last thing to do was wash the outside that had been covered in mud and dust from the country roads.

Had Aziraphale not been so preoccupied with being annoyed, he would have noticed Crowley was not sleeping at all. He was in fact watching the Angel with unadulterated lust.

The dark shades hid the burning passion in the yellows eyes as they roamed Aziraphale’s body, muscles exerting with effort. Aziraphale missed the ragged gasps from the Demon when he bent over the seats to reach a difficult spot. Normally loose trousers hugged tightly to his plush rear from the stretch, Crowley couldn’t help but lick his lips. A little wiggle of a buttocks had Crowley sucking in a sharp breath. The Demon had a wicked idea. It was one of those ideas that made you uncomfortably horny in a way you know that you shouldn’t be aroused by the very idea.

Crowley mused to himself as he imagined bending the Angel over the bonnet of the Bentley and having his way with him. He wondered if Aziraphale would enjoy it as much as he did making love in the back seats like teenagers. The growing erection Crowley started to feel in his jeans was becoming a nuisance. He subtly tried to adjust the crotch to alleviate the pressure.

The sound of Aziraphale humming as he filled a bucket with water from the tap just outside of the cottage was joyful. He added the soap and squeezed the sponge full of water over the roof of the car, fully absorbed in the task of making the car shine. Oblivious to his partners simmer lust.

Crowley allowed his eyes to wander, the rolled up shirt sleeves was a good look on Aziraphale. It exposed the Angel's forearms, strong from carrying towers of heavy books over the years. He desperately wanted to lick the sweat that was rolling down the Angel’s neck. Imagining embracing Aziraphale from behind to get a taste, Crowley hummed his approval at the thought of all the delicious sounds the other would make.

The Demon was rudely interrupted from his daydream by a sudden shriek from the Angel. He sat up quickly, ready to pounce on what was bothering the white-haired beauty. Crowley staggered for a second, his sunglasses sliding down the bridge of his nose as he was frozen in place. His brain short-circuited as he took in the scene in front of him. Aziraphale’s entire front was soaking wet and the pale shirt was starting to become see-through. The Demon tried to stifle an aching groan into his fist and failed miserably.

Obviously the Angel meant to throw the water over the bonnet to remove the suds, he just didn’t expect the recoil of water to splash him back quite so drastically. The result meant one of his favourite shirts was now completely sodden on his skin, and his trousers darkened with wet patches.

“Dear, can you hand me a towel, please.” Aziraphale shook his hands disgruntled and attempted to wipe the spray off his face.

Crowley stalked towards the unassuming Angel like a starving predator. Cornering the surprised Aziraphale against the slippery bonnet, the red-haired Demon captured plush lips in a heated kiss. Demanding hands grabbed large hips and pulled him closer, the desire to feel Aziraphale’s wet clothed body against his own was like an out of control fire .

“You don’t play fair, Angel. You’re supposed to be cleaning my car, not getting it dirty again” Crowley murmured between nibbling Aziraphale’s bottom lip. The Angel was entirely caught off guard, he offered quiet mewls in response to Crowley administrations.

“Wh..what do you mean Crowley, I have been cleaning it!?” Aziraphale spluttered indignantly the moment he managed to find his footing. Ivory cheeks flushed a deep crimson as he felt the water on the bonnet soak the back of his trousers.

“Hmm, are you sure?” Crowley surveyed over his dark glasses. He licked his lips seductively while he leaned down to recapture the Angel’s mouth, tongue seeking entrance.

Aziraphale opened his lips to accept the questing tongue, shivering at the heated sensation travelling down his spine. For a moment he considered the spell from yesterday hadn’t worn off completely. Being pinned and surrounded by the essence of Crowley was exceedingly intoxicating.

“Shall I inspect your handy work, Angel?” Crowley pulled back to breathe lascivious whispers against the Aziraphale’s ear. He smirked at the full body shudder in response to his words.

Crowley stepped back and twisted Aziraphale around so that he was facing towards the car. He couldn’t help the hot spike of arousal shooting to his groin at the sight of wet trousers clinging to thick thighs.

While the cottage was well hidden down a country lane, the Demon once again wasn’t pleased by the idea of any mortal stumbling upon them. So with a small miracle he cloaked the acres of the land they were renting so that any unexpected visitors would suddenly feel the unexplained urge to turn around immediately and go home.

The practicalities now sorted meant Crowley could turn his attention back to the waiting Angel. Yesterday, it was Aziraphale who was frenzied and desperate. Today, Crowley was alarmed at the extreme need he felt to bend the Angel over the bonnet. Could spells be contagious? Having the Angel invade his personal spaces, especially the Bentley in an intimate manner was becoming addicting. Why he’d resisted so long in the first place was beyond him.

Stepping forward Crowley encircled his arms around Aziraphale’s waist. Placing gentle kisses against the Angel’s neck, he groaned at the taste of sweat and soap. Knowing it was from Aziraphales dedicated hard work to clean his beloved Bentley made it all the more sweeter. Deft fingers massaged the front of the white-haired Angel’s thighs, travelling quickly to undo his trousers.

“Ccc..Crowley...people will see!” Aziraphale stuttered mortified, hands quickly grasping the others before they could expose his growing arousal.

“Let them, I don’t mind” Crowley drawled wickedly, enjoying how the Angel trembled in his hands. It wouldn’t hurt to let the Angel believe they were unguarded, just for a little fun.

Crowley continued to lavish the Angel’s neck with kisses and bites while he opened his trousers. Delicately pulling out Aziraphale’s hardening cock, long fingers curling around the shorter length to firmly stroke it. The Angel hastily covered his mouth with one hand, trying his hardest to not let any moans slip past. However Crowley knew the Angel’s body well enough now to be able to draw out the most pleasure. Aziraphle couldn't help but be vocal. The wiley old Demon knew just where to stroke and caress to reduce the Angel into a puddle of pleasure.

Lapping up the delicious, quiet whimpers coming from Aziraphale, Crowley picked up the pace of his stroking while he dropped the Angel’s trousers to the floor. Aziraphale gasped, shuddering at the feeling of cool air on his heated skin. Craning his head to look at the Demon with half-lidded eyes, Aziraphale reached his other hand back to hold on to Crowley's neck.

“Oh, oh my love, that feels very nice.” Aziraphale breathed, he was almost at full hardness when Crowley took the opportunity to harshly bite his stretched neck. The white-haired Angel couldn’t hold back the startled cry escaping through his fingers. Back arching at the pleasure, his naked plush buttocks brushed against Crowley’s groin enticingly and tore a pleased hiss from the Demon.

“You feel nice, Angel” Crowley hummed his indulgence into white curls, rolling his hips against the exposed cheeks. When he started to feel Aziraphale’s plump cock begin to leak he let go suddenly, placating the Angel’s whimpered protests with more kisses to his hair.

Aziraphale whined at the sudden loss of friction. He felt his face heat with embarrassment as he thought of how he must look. Standing next to the car half naked, hard and dripping. Heaven would be ashamed of his wanton lust. Crowley abruptly moved away from him and knelt just behind him. Confused, Aziraphale tried to turn around but was held in place by strong hands on his buttocks.

“Crooo…..AAAh!” Aziraphale moaned in surprise as he felt the distinct swipe of a tongue against his butt cheek. Crowley smirked at the Angel’s unrestrained shudders as he massaged the flesh in front of him with his tongue and hands.

Aziraphale placed unsteady hands against the wet bonnet, this was a strange new feeling but not unpleasant. Somehow it felt more vulnerable to have Crowley down there and not be able to see him. Aziraphale was positive Crowley looked as pleased as a cat who got the cream. After a few minutes of talented ministrations of the snake Demon’s tongue, the Angel decided he liked the feeling after all and had settled into a rhythm of quiet moans.

Crowely couldn’t get enough of tasting Aziraphale. The intoxicating mix of sand, ink and parchment really shouldn’t be arousing in this context. Nonetheless Crowley craved to taste more, possess the Angel and entwine their souls as much as possible. The red-haired Demon groaned against flesh as a devilish idea struck him. He’d seen humans do a lot of things with sex but over the six millenia he’s spent on earth he never really had much desire to try anything more than standard fornication. That is, until Aziraphale.

Delicately he pried open the plush cheeks in front of his nose and leaned forward to lick a hot wet stripe over Aziraphale’s entrance with a forked tongue. The resulting unrestrained moan from the Angel was gloriously loud, heaven may have heard it.

“Oh...oh goodness, Crowley...oh GOD...ww...what are you doing!?” Aziraphale stammered, the surprise had caused him to slip on the still wet bonnet and left him bent over it on his elbows. The new position, to Crowley’s delight, provoked his buttocks to stick out further and provide better access. Each lap at his hole sent a shot of molten hot arousal directly to his cock, Aziraphale couldn’t believe what Crowley was doing. It was so incredibly dirty, his cheeks flushed deeply with shame. Mortified, he couldn’t stop his hips seeking to push back against the wet sensation of Crowley’s tongue. Aziraphale desperately tried to stifle his moans, when Crowley pushed against the ring of his entrance. He thought it was jolly good luck no one had discovered them yet.

Crowley spent an agonising amount of time making sure Aziraphale was a shuddering, leaking mess by the time he finished his ministrations. He’d used a small miracle to retrieve the bottle of lube they’d used yesterday into his hands and start to prep the Angel. Once he was two fingers deep into Aziraphale, Crowley leaned back to inspect his work. Aziraphale’s stout legs trembled with the strained effort of holding his awkward position over the Bentley. The sight was incredibly arousing to the Demon, licking his lips he felt his own erection leak in answer.

The Angel felt feather-light kisses placed along the backs of his plump thighs with the intention to soothe him. Aziraphale panted, gently pushing his hips backwards to encourage the stretching fingers deeper, he was already still loose from yesterday's activities. Smirking against the Angel’s skin, Crowley trailed his kisses towards his tightening balls. The high-pitched moans that tumbled from Aziraphale’s lips, elicited a satisfied smile from the red-haired Demon.

“Such a naughty Angel” Crowley sucked innocently on the skin of the Angel's sensitive balls, crooking his fingers to seek out his pleasure.

Liquid heat filled Aziraphales ethereal being at an alarming rate, it felt like his body was engulfed in a pleasurable hellfire. He breathed heavily while his nerves sang with euphoria to rival a harmonious choir- the sinful snake’s tongue left him feeling weak. Waves of ecstasy crashed through his body like an unrelenting sea storm. He unsuccessfully tried to stifle gasps at the sensation of three fingers stretching needlessly his already loose entrance. Aziraphale didn’t know how much longer he could last under the overwhelming onslaught. Breathing a small sigh of relief when he felt Crowley remove his fingers, Aziraphale expected that it wouldn’t be long until he was filled by the Demon.

“Dear? Oh? oh, fuuuck!” Aziraphale suddenly keened against the Bentley. He assumed Crowley would line up his cock, however instead he choose to tongue his gaping entrance. The wet appendage sent electric spikes of pleasure coursing through his veins like wildfire. Aziraphale gasped against the smooth bonnet of the car, breath fogging up the shining paint work. The poor Angel was so lost in ecstasy that he hardly noticed he was drooling, otherwise he’d be thoroughly embarrassed.

Crowley at hearing Aziraphale swear went wild. He redoubled his efforts to drive the Angel further into an incoherent mess before he decided to stand up, strip his trousers and press his neglected arousal into the blissful heat.

“Fuck, you drive me mad Angel” Crowley growled and thrust forward. The delighted moans from Aziraphale was a musical symphony to the Demon’s ears. Better than anything Beethoven or Bach ever created. Crowley knelt over Aziraphale's body and rested his forehead against trembling shoulder blades. The snug heated feeling of being inside the Angel was maddening, suffocating and perfect all at once. Placing a sweet aching kiss to the closest shoulder, Crowley gripped plump hips and canted his own forward eagerly.

Aziraphale closed his eyes against the onslaught of white hot pleasure from being stretched so impossibly full. The first thrusts into his heat, stole the breath he didn’t need. He tried desperately to find purchase on the bonnet of the Bentley but it was still slippery. Crowley's lanky body pushing him possessively closer to the body of the car sent a lick of heated arousal across his nerves. He couldn’t help the small moans falling past his lips.

Setting an easy pace, Crowley laced his hands with the Angel's against the car. His angular hips pistoning powerfully to draw out more pleasured cries. The thrusts became so vigorous that Crowley’s glasses slipped clean off his nose and fell to the floor forgotten.

Crowley swore as he chased the coiling feeling deep in his groin. Aziraphale’s insides were squeezing him in such a delightful manner he didn't want to finish so quickly. It was this precise moment that he and the Bentley must have reached a spiritual level of understanding because the CD player started playing again. The melodious beginning of ‘Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy’ by Queen filtered through the open windows. Crowley would laugh if he wasn’t busy groaning his pleasure against Aziraphale’s ear.

“Oh ...Crowley...dear...I’m close...” Aziraphale panted heavily, he tried to push back onto the Demon’s cock from his pinned position. He was dancing on the precipice of molten heat, a tight sensation ready to burst in his groin if he could just get a bit more friction. Crowley sensing the Angel’s heightened pleasure, he was positively glowing, was only too happy to oblige. Roaring his own pleasure into Aziraphale's shoulder blade his thrusts became even more zealous, hitting the Angel’s prostate each time.

Electricity lit up Aziraphale’s nerves at the new pace, he keened against Crowley. Too breathless to voice his joy any louder. The Angel closed his eyes, visions of light exploding across his vision. There was barely enough sense in his mind to register the feeling of long fingers reaching underneath for his heavy, weeping erection. Scantily lasting a few firm strokes, Aziraphale released his passion across the black paint. Lost in the euphoria of ejaculating, the celestial being cried out against their still laced fingers. His hips spasming between the onslaught of dual sensations.

Feeling Aziraphale clamp down on his own erection, Crowley whimpered. The sight of the Angel draped against the car panting desperately. Grey eyes were half closed but still conscious enough to regard the Demon with a tender look.

“Crowley…” Aziraphale whispered lovingly, one hand reached back to hold the one on his hip, squeezing encouragingly.

The Demon never stood a chance. Crowley's orgasm was ripped from him in a hot explosion, thick streams filling the Angel as he growled his pleasure into the others neck.

Crowley, when he regained partial consciousness, picked up the soft sound of a subdued hiccup and sniffle. Concerned he removed his softening cock gently and squeezed the shuddering Angel into a tightest hug his weak limbs could managed.

“Aziraphale, darling, did I do something wrong?” Crowley pressed tentatively.

“No, my dear, but your car....” Aziraphale sniffed again, wrapping his hands around the arms on his waist reassuringly.

“What about it?” Crowley hummed against soft, white curls, relieved the Angel wasn’t upset with him.

“I’m afraid it’s dirty again now” Aziraphale complained with a severe blush.

Crowley leaned their tired bodies back so he could see the state of his beloved car. There was indeed a thick dribble of come sliding down the bonnet and a new collection of hand prints all over the ebony paint work. He smiled softly at Aziraphale’s teary, frustrated expression. It was typically sweet of him to be upset at getting the car in state again, it left a soft warm feeling in his gut.

“Don’t worry about it, love. I’ll help this time.” Crowley snickered, peppering kisses across Aziraphale’s cheek.


End file.
